A Testimonial to the Grace and Impact of Love It Forward List

 

"It’s been a while since I’ve wanted to write this. This is a public letter to Carol. 💛

(Trigger warning: This text discusses sensitive topics related to mental health and may be triggering for some. If you're not feeling well mentally, I recommend reading with caution, and I hope you can find help and feel better soon.)

Carol, my name is Ezequiel. I’ve been part of the project for years, and I’m very grateful to have sent so many letters, drawings, and cards over the years. I often feel a sense of hopelessness about life, and helping others in some way is one of the things that brings me peace.

During my time in the project, I’ve seen letters sent to so many different people, each facing unique challenges, some even near the end of life. I imagine many who received the project’s love may no longer be with us.

I’m sending this message to talk about Emily. Emily was my best friend — the sister that life gave me. Back in 2017/2018, she was going through a deep depression, and I asked Love It Forward List for help to support her during that time.

You were incredibly kind and attentive, shared Emily’s story with others, and she received thousands of letters, books, and beautiful things — it was like a big, warm hug for her. Emily kept everything with great care and would often go back and look through it all. She always told me it was one of the most beautiful things that ever happened in her life.

Over time, Emily began to recover from depression and returned to living, though never fully. Since 2020, the depression started creeping back, and she was later diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. She spent years seeking treatment, facing deeply painful and shocking experiences, but she always tried to find strength to stay well.

During those years, she graduated in Nutrition, began studying Nursing, and even wanted to become a firefighter — her dream was always to help others. That was her greatest passion.

This month marks 8 months since Emily took her own life. She fought so hard, but she reached every limit imaginable. The grief I’m living with is heavy, but I find a bit of strength in the photos, videos, and memories of the good moments we shared.

Love It Forward List is one of those memories, and I needed to come here to thank you for everything. Your project is incredibly special — it made Emily’s days brighter and undoubtedly helped her through that difficult time. She suffered immensely, but I can assure you that among all the pain, the memory of the love she received from this project was always with her.

She always wanted to reply to all the letters she received, but life — and her mental health struggles — didn’t allow it.

Thank you immensely for everything. I wanted to make this testimony public to show everyone — especially those who are just arriving — how important the Love It Forward List truly is."

Ezequiel Pereira, Sao Paulo, Brazil.